August 04, 2004

The Big Fat Nothing

I could bore you with a not-very-interesting story explaining why I've been neglecting this blog, or I could send you off a couple other places. I don't know about you, but I vote the latter:

  • This is exactly how I am about bugs. A recurring argument between my boyfriend and me goes something like, "Why do I have to be the one to kill it? It's in your apartment," which is inevitably met with "Because you're the man and killing bugs is the man's job." Seriously, men?--It really is. You can protest that all you want; you can yack about how this proves that when women say "feminism" they really mean "all the fun parts with none of the increased responsibility," but just as you're working yourself up into high dudgeon you might just notice, in the periphery of your vision, your woman quietly packing her bags and leaving in search of a man who will just kill the damned bug already and spare her the lecture.

  • This is the version of the SAT I should have taken, provided my first choice--substituting the Paul Anka Band Entrance Examination--was deemed unacceptable.

  • There is an update to the story about the shysters who ripped off $30,000 from a charity; you know, those shysters, the ones who ripped off $30,000 from a charity that was sending toys to Iraqi children? The ones who, if there is a Hell, have surely by now been voted Most Likely to Burn Within It Forever by its lesser and greater demon residents? Well, there's an update, and it involves the magic L-word: Lawyers. Thank goodness.

    Posted by Ilyka at August 4, 2004 07:13 PM in navel gazing
    • Comments

    Mice. Mice catching is definitely a man's job. It's in their genes, or in their cultural memory and being a big mighty hunter.

    Posted by: Rachel Ann at August 4, 2004 10:05 PM

    Buy a can of carb cleaner at your local auto parts store. Best bug killer in the world and it's cheap and easy to use.

    FWIW, I think that with all the talk of 'equal rights' and such, the person who sees the bug should be the one to kill it.

    H.

    Posted by: Hal at August 5, 2004 04:32 AM

    Funny, and cute!

    Just one question, though -- if Killing The Bug is the man's job, now and forever, then which household tasks are automatically the women's job? When is a man justified to, as you say, pack up and leave, because a woman is exasperated at having to do the woman's job?

    (No fair talking about childbirth here. Both women and men are perfectly capable of killing bugs... but you want a man to do that for you. Fine. Which job can both men and women do, which men would be justified in always expecting a woman to perform?)

    I'm not trying to be sarcastic here. I'd like to know what you expect the reverse situation to look like.

    respectfully,
    Daniel in Medford

    Posted by: Daniel in Medford at August 5, 2004 06:42 PM

    FINE! I'LL DOUCHE MYSELF!

    (That, Daniel in Medford, was sarcasm.)

    And really, if Ilyka has a man who accepts the responsibility of Killing The Bugs, then what do you care? I'm sure that she makes up for it, somehow.

    Posted by: Emma at August 7, 2004 01:54 AM

    Well, if I suscribed to that belief, my apartment would be crawling with our six-legged fellow beings. This is Florida -- you have to kill them quick before they multiply, and there is no time to get into an argument about it.

    Besides, all the men I've known are either: 1) dead; 2) from some lifeless place Up North and therefore unable to deal with bugs; or 3) like my ex-boyfriend, who thought he was a Buddhist and insisted on "rescuing" and releasing into the wild all the roaches, spiders, and wasps he came across.

    (One exception is wasps. I refuse to do anything about the growing nest hanging from my patio roof. That's why there's a maintenance crew, supposedly.)

    Posted by: Andrea Harris at August 8, 2004 06:41 PM

    Ladies; ...and you can quote me on this
    "No guy should be permitted to marry or co-habitate untill he's lived, successfully, on his own for a minimum of a year." You can't appreciate the other partner's contribution untill you've been there yourself.

    Blue jobs; anything to do with tools and maintenance, yardwork, disposing of dead stuff
    ---if your male companion can't or won't do the above, throw him back, he ain't a keeper.

    Pink jobs; negotiable for Emma's concept. heh...

    Posted by: DaninVan at August 9, 2004 03:13 AM

    You know...

    If you type "Big Fat Nothing" into Google and hit the "I'm feeling lucky" button, this is where you end up.

    Don't really know where I stand on bugs.

    Peace out, yo.

    Posted by: Brooks at December 1, 2004 07:50 PM