February 28, 2005

Attack of the Clones

Women of Hollywood: There are looks besides nude lipstick with high gloss, kohl eyeliner, and the mermaid dress. Points to all of you--it appears to be a grand total of three of you so far--who realized this.

The rest of you, it's like you came off the same pornographic assembly line. Never tell me what creative, artistic individuals you are again.

UPDATE: That really was all I had to say about the Academy Awards--especially since it looks like Phil Dennison's said anything else I might have wanted to, but didn't:

Well, Beyonce again. And shes wearing an entire Cartier store around her neck. Im not actually hearing a note of this song, because its so god-awful middle-of-the-road in its Andrew Lloyd Webberesness.
Scroll up, down, and all around for more. Especially the part where he gets Sean Penn's number. (Can't tell if he's being serious or sarcastic about Hillary Swank, though. I'm hoping the latter. You ever have people you just dislike from the get-go? Hillary Swank is one of those people for me.) Posted by Ilyka at February 28, 2005 03:39 AM in trivia

Don't know what it is about Swank - I just can't bring myself to like her - not even a little bit.

Penn, on the other hand - well, it's easy to figure out why I don't like that humorless, pretentious, bad-acting jerkoff.

Posted by: michele at February 28, 2005 05:12 PM

not even a little bit.

Me either. I know I'm supposed to dig her as a classic trailer-park-to-riches story, but every time she brings it up (which would be often), I find myself giggling over an old SNL sketch where some woman doing an impression of Jewel kept going on and on about how she used to live in her car. Jewel? Hillary? We get it. Really.

Penn, damn him, can act, so up 'til last night I always tried to remember that while forgetting about his unfortunate personalitectomy. But that huffy defense of Jude Law, now, that was the straw that broke the camel's. When Rock came out afterwards and said his "accountants" needed a word with Penn, I was thinking "No, seriously, Chris--DO IT. For reals."

Posted by: ilyka at February 28, 2005 05:46 PM

DAMN! I knew I was forgetting something. The Oscars was last night? [/snark]

I liked Swank (maybe that's it. . .that stupid name?) in Boys Don't Cry. A lot.

But then again, I can't think of a single one I would invite over to my house for dinner. Ever.

I have a real problem with pretension. Does it show?

Posted by: Margi at February 28, 2005 08:02 PM

Pretention. ?? Now, neither one looks right. Fuuuuuckity fuck fuck.

SHEEE-IT, I hate it when I do that. I'm getting more coffee.

Posted by: Margi at February 28, 2005 08:03 PM

You know what word never looks correct to me? "Publicly." I have no idea why.

I think "pretension" is the correct one, going off the root "pretense." Now I'm wondering if the British change that to "pretence." Wait, WAIT: "Pretense" is already a noun. So we don't need to put an -ion on the end of it at all . . . no, that isn't right either. Pretentiousness? But now that has a "t" in it . . . .

I give up. DANG YOU, MARGI!

Posted by: ilyka at February 28, 2005 08:09 PM