April 27, 2005

One in a Million

It ain't every man who will go along with you when you come home from the bar and want to put on this, or who will then humor you when you feel like throwing a softball lemon around to "practice your fielding."

Which is pretty funny right there, considering your softball experience amounts to hours (and hours, and hours) in the backyard with your dad, whose idea of coaching was to yell over and over, "KEEP your EYES on the BALL! Eyes on the BALL!"

And then after missing a bunch of throws, with the sweat running down your brow and your arms feeling all rubber, you'd yell, "I AM keeping my eye on the ball!"

And he'd look you right in the eye and say, "If you'd been keeping your eye on the BALL, you woulda CAUGHT it."

It's not a bad coaching method. Because when I forget that I never did own a proper glove or get picked early for a team--when I forget all that? And I'm just tossing that softball lemon around? And I'm keeping my eye on the ball lemon?

I got a pretty decent record.

But you got to keep your eyes on the ball.

Posted by Ilyka at April 27, 2005 09:03 AM in navel gazing

Man, I feel so weird noticing this, but my son's 7 and a half and never played baseball. It's always been soccer.

And although I played baseball as a kid, I have no urge to get him to play little league or teach him that stuff.

I guess I'm weird.

Posted by: Dean Esmay at April 27, 2005 11:32 AM

My only complaint about "All World" is that it didn't include "I'm That Type of Guy". "Rock the Bells" is the awesomest song ever though.

Posted by: Combustible Boy at April 27, 2005 12:29 PM

If you're that good with a lemon, imagine how you'd do with a nectarine!

Once you go Clementine, you'll never go back.

Posted by: Jim at April 27, 2005 03:51 PM

That's weird, because "Mama Said Knock You Out" always makes me want to play a ferocious, take-no-prisoners game of badminton.

Posted by: Hubris at April 27, 2005 04:07 PM