July 28, 2005

Great Moments in Fantasy Role-Playing, I Mean Lit-er-ah-CHOOR

Oh, but it's cute when you do it to AmeriKKKa:

If a kid wrote a passage of skinhead literature, he'd be sent to the shrink, possibly kicked out of school, and his parents would be getting a call from social services. Same goes for any social outcast that gave the slightest indication of violent fantasies, much less actually turning in a paper full of them. A kid who wrote a paper role-playing as a soldier in the desert blowing away every Muslim in his path certainly wouldn't be given an award. The passage "I hate the Iraqi People" wouldn't be allowed to stand.
But we do, right? Hate the Iraqi people, I mean. That's why we stuffed 400,000 of them into mass graves and all. I mean we did that, even if "we" didn't "actually" do that, because, see, we used to support Saddam Hussein so it's like we did it. We did it before we didn't do it. Also, oil. And Gitmo. And Abu Ghraib. And see here: The only reason we haven't matched "our" previous 400,000 body count in those two places is because . . . I mean, we're working on it? Look, Saddam's gonna be a tough act to follow. We should put him back in charge, actually, so Iraq can be a sovereign nation again. Anyway, we deserve it, all of it, just for living in a filthy police state run by BushCo.

But you knew all that already, right?

Posted by Ilyka at July 28, 2005 05:59 AM in hell is other people | TrackBack

I think it's OK since I can make up my own ending:

To truly show the world what it means to be Muslim, I reach under my salwaar kameez and release the catch of dynamite strapped to my chest. Two minutes. Silence. THEN!!!!! The detonator fails!

I am forced to watch the enemy infidels prepare an impromptu pancake-and-sausage(!)-link breakfast on my favorite skillet. My grandmother and I used to wave that skillet in the air happily as we danced on the path that led to the bubbles and chocolate factory. The soldiers now laugh as they inspect my failed explosive device, and suggest it must have been made by something they call the "ACME" company. Then they pack me up for the camp. Cheap-ass fucking detonator.

Sometimes it sucks being an angry Moslem. Sigh.

Posted by: Hubris at July 28, 2005 03:15 PM

danced on the path that led to the bubbles and chocolate factory


Posted by: ilyka at July 28, 2005 06:13 PM