In the comments here, Helen says her year (1992) oughtta win for Worst Year on account of the inclusion, at #15, of this song.
You have to admit, that's a formidable contender.
But have you seen Geek Empire's list? It's got your Britney. It's got your Christina Aguilera. It's got your Backstreet Boys, it's got your N'Sync, it's got your R. Kelly/Celine Dion duet that I didn't know ever even happened.
I can't even imagine what that sounds like. I mean, she is the best singer in the world!
Party like it's 1999--yeah, how can you, with that soundtrack? Did I mention . . . the Whitney Houston/Mariah Carey duet? That I also did not know ever even happened?
(Though it does have one of my favorites on there--that mean ol' Francis crossed out, him and his Goo Goo Dolls-lovin' self. How could you, Francis. How could you. You heartless bastard.)
Posted by Ilyka at September 1, 2005 07:07 AM in trivia | TrackBack"Achy Breaky Heart" is bad, but I think my list can top it.
Mine has "Copacabana". Now, that song is frightening.
Posted by: The Countess at September 1, 2005 05:18 PM"How could you. You heartless bastard."
sniff You have no idea how much that means to me. I'm all broken up over here. That's the nicest thing anybody's ever said about me.
Sounds like...Every girl I've ever dated, actually. But coming from Ilyka, being called "Heartless" carries a certain special something.
But seriously, Maxwell? I know it's hard to beat lyrics like this :
"Never seen a sun shine like this
Never seen the moon glow like this
Never seen the waterfalls like this
Never seen the lights off like this
Never dug anyone like this
Never had tasty lips to kiss
Never had someone to miss
Never wrote a song quite like this "
Genius, obviously. Shakespeare has nothing on this guy. I know there's that line in Romeo and Juliet where he gets all "I have never seen bosoms like thine, / I have never written a quatrain such as this", and he says it over and over and over, but Maxwell just blows him away. I can't believe Maxwell didn't beat "Livin' La Vida Loca" at no. 10.
Posted by: francis at September 2, 2005 12:34 AMOoh, BRING IT. I suppose the more Shakespearean couplets are:
And I don't want the world to see me
Cause I don't think that they'd understand
When everything's made to be broken
I just want you to know who I am
He just wants her to know who he is! So she'll fuck him! Because everything's made to be broken and, uh, entropy and shit, and like inevitable decay is so romantic. WHEN YOU'RE FIFTEEN, maybe.
Posted by: ilyka at September 2, 2005 01:09 AMActually, I think that last paragraph is a pretty darn good encapsulation of Romeo and Juliet right there. Entropy and shit, inevitable decay, impossible love, dual suicides at the end.
Dear God, Romeo and Juliet is nothing more than an unusually well written emo song. There's a book report for you.
But yes, Goo Goo Dolls aren't the most mature band. For the record, I was seventeen, still a juvenile myself. And even then, I thought this was stupid:
Fortunate to have you girl,
I'm so glad you're in my world,
Just as sure as the sky is blue,
I bless the day that I found you.
Roses are Red, Violets are blue,
I love ya, though your breath smells like poo.
Posies are purple, Ivy is green,
Now take off your pants.
Okay, okay, I made some of that up. But only some of it, honest. I've read better poetry in junior high student journals. I've written better bad poetry than that, and that's saying alot. "Just as sure as the sky is blue / I bless the day I found you"? That's not just an impressively unoriginal line for a song, I think I've seen that line in chain emails of bad pickup lines, right between "Do you use windex on your pants?" and "Nice shoes, wanna fuck?"
Posted by: francis at September 3, 2005 12:01 AMnnnnnnnnnnnn!!
Posted by: n at October 14, 2005 11:55 AM