Ilyka Damen

For the Animal Lovers

Two things: One, I missed Helen's birthday. I am sorry, Helen; I am a terrible person. Many happy returns, belatedly.

Two, and more important, Helen is thinking of having a fundraiser for the Royal Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Animals. She's maybe planning to sell t-shirts emblazoned with an image of the lovable puppy she's adopted from that organization. Personally, I hope she chooses this one:

You can lend your support or just read more about it here.

For Pet People

Ith pointed me to this:

The thing I want to say is simply that there are thousands upon thousands of animals stuck out here, on car roofs, on porches, cats on roofs of houses. We saw no other animal rescue orgs anywhere. I know they’re all doing good work on the peripheries … but, oh man … you see and hear these fluff pieces on TV of people being reunited with their pets, and you look around out here on the boats at this vast, endless wasteland of toxic water and animals hanging on, 11 days after the hurricane, and their time is running out.

So see what you can do, huh? I used to give to Best Friends regularly, and they're a great outfit. I'm not surprised to find out they're right there in the thick of the things, trying to help.

You Are Big Boys and Girls

You can find the Hurricane Katrina blogburst participants and the charitable organizations they're boosting all by your own grownup selves, right? Right? Because I went to link NZ Bear's list of participating webloggers, on account of it's Thursday and this is supposed to be the big day for getting the relief flowing . . . but I got a MySQL error. I imagine the database is taking quite a beating with all this.

Anyway, as I've been having sentiments like these the last couple days--

So if I don’t put up a big long list of charities, it’s because I figure you can find them yourself – the Red Cross isn’t exactly hiding in a shack in Utah waving a shotgun at anyone who comes up the road, and the Salvation Army can probably be summoned if you stand on a street corner with a Bible and a tuba and start belting out “Bringing in the Sheaves.”

--I said to hell with it; if you folks want a blogburst, I trust you to find yourselves one. (Incidentally, the charity endorsed by Hugh Hewitt, as mentioned in that piece, looks utterly worthy and yes, I said Hugh Hewitt, and no, I don't wanna hear none of your snark, and yes, that admonishment is also directed at myself, a habitual offender in that regard. Like the man says, though, they send food to kids. I can't fault that and if you can, please go away now.)

Personally, I'm getting a little nervous that Rob hasn't been back online for awhile. Be safe, Rob and family. Be well. And for pity's sake find some way to give a holler out somewhere if you need anything. We're listening.

(Oh, never mind--the NZ Bear list came up this time. Give it a try if you like. If you can't find a worthy charity on that list, I don't know what would please you.)

Hit It

Hit it hard. Oh, yeah. Doesn't that feel good?

Here's why I think you should take a sec to give Meryl your lunch money: Because she's my friend and I asked you to and come on, what more reason do you idiots need?

Fine. It's like this: Not only is Meryl a fun person, she's a fun read--when she's, um, not being an educational read, or a poignant read, or an angry read, or an hysterical read, or a scornful read.

Best of all, she manages to avoid everything about blogging that I loathe--Meryl does not rely on gimmicks. It's all original material. It must be exhausting work sometimes, but she does it. No quizzes. No catchphrases (okay, a few catchphrases--but none of that "heh-indeed" business).

Drop her a fiver or more. Would it kill you?

Bad Old Week

So how's everybody doing out there? Serenity? Michele? Kate? Everyone having a fantastic week so far?

Yeah, me neither. I have to remind myself that Nick Berg's family is having an excruciating week of torment just to snap myself out of the big pity party I've been throwing myself. What's my week to that? Nothing, that's what.

Anyway, an antidote: Alan at the Command Post cooked up a neat little "make a difference" solution for times like these--"A Response to Murder: Strengthen the Good." An excerpt:

Tonight, I finished watching the HBO documentary My Flesh And Blood, which tells the story of Susan Tom, a 53-year-old single mother in Fairfield, California. Susan is the mother of 13 children, 11 of whom she has adopted, many of whom suffer from handicaps and diseases. Teenagers Hannah and Xenia were born without legs. Anthony has a degenerative and usually fatal skin disease. Eight-year-old Faith has disfiguring scars and no hair from being badly burned as an infant. Joe, 15, recently passed away from cystic fibrosis. Margaret, 18, helps Susan raise the family.
. . .
I turn from that documentary to The Command Post, where I see posted the photographs of Nick Berg’s beheading, and I’m struck bluntly by the complete antithesis of Susan Tom: murder, brutality, and disgusting inhumanity. In moments, I went from having tears in my eyes to having bile in my throat. And I’m left wondering, as I’m sure are most of us are, what exactly to make of it all.

Well, I’ve decided what to make of it all, and what I’m going to make is some good. Susan Tom is a hero … one of millions … waking each day with a commitment to make the lives of others better through love. Hers is an example to which humanity should aspire. So my response to the murder of Nick Berg and the inhumanity it represents is to use it as motivation to give to Susan Tom and the humanity she represents.

It's a noble idea, one that leaves me wondering how long it's going to take me to overcome my own wicked urges to say, "Christ, just nuke Mecca already;" how much more work I'll have to do on myself, how much more grace of God I'll have to seek, before I can start acting as Alan is acting--in the true spirit of humanity and generosity.

If you want to give, please follow the instructions Alan has outlined here.

And may we all have better days ahead.

Let's Review!

So there's this multi-blog charity drive to raise money for this Spirit of America fund request, to help the Marines build television stations for Iraqis. That much we should have down by now, right? If not, well, read all about it at the link above, or read why I think it matters here.

And now review all the fabulous offers out there for donating:

The Victory Coalition offers are summarized for you here (along with some offers from other chari-blogging teams).

The Liberty Alliance offers are on display RIGHT here:

Val Prieto is willing to dress in drag for $40 and willing to shave his legs for donations of $200.

Cox and Forkum have offered for auction a signed print of one of their cartoons.

EPoet is offering a unique photo from his tour in Iraq for $10 donations, and both a post on any topic you specify AND an original poem for donations of $50.

Personalized audio files, available on a sliding scale ($5, $10, or $20 donations), are available from Dizzy Girl.

Hard to top this one--you can bid on a speaking engagement by none other than Chief Wiggles, the man behind Operation Give: Toys for Iraqi Children. Not only that, but you can bid on an old Iraqi dinar and a mint-condition "Operation Iraqi Freedom" patch!

Or perhaps you're in the market for a hand-made gun belt, offered by Raging Dave of Four Right Wing Wackos?

Dean and Rosemary's offers still stand: A post on the topic of your choice; a post by BOTH Dean and The Queen of All Evil on the topic of your choice; or, if you prefer, Rosemary will, ah, "let it all hang out," if you know what I'm saying (and if you don't, well, you can read about it).

My pitiful offers still stand, too. You know how when you're little and you say you don't want to take piano lessons, or go to soccer practice, or whatever, anymore, because piano lessons/soccer practice/chess club/whatever are "not cool" or "totally gay" or "for losers?" And you know how your parents say to you then that one day you'll be sorry, and that it's very important to develop your talents early, instead of wasting them? Your parents were right.

Finally, you can peruse the offers from the Fighting Fuzzballs on this page.

Quit goofing off. Help the newly-united blog coalitions meet their goal of $50,000 by tonight. Pick your preferred prize and claim it by donating today!

Posted by Ilyka at 10:39 PM | Comments (0)

Five Dollars

People, it's only $5.00. If you can't have charity in your heart, at least have mercy on me and my pride.

(Oh, and guess which family members I'm no longer speaking to if they don't help me out on this one: Every. Last. One of them.)

Besides, I know you're dying to find out how bad my poetry is. Here's a hint: It's very, very bad. Almost this bad.

In fact, maybe I should be offering a deal where you give Spirit of America $5.00 NOT to have me write you any poetry.

Five dollars, and you can say you participated in the building of Iraqi owned and operated television stations. Five dollars, and you say you helped lay the foundations for freedom in Iraq. Five dollars, and you can take your pick of an interview, a Tarot reading, or . . . er, the poetry. Yes, all right, so I'm rethinking the poetry.

Five dollars. Do you have any idea what I will think of you if you can't spare $5.00? I have friends I've parted ways with because they can't leave $5.00 tip on a restaurant check. And here you're going to stiff the people of Iraq in this endeavor? No way, buddy. Five bucks. Now. Do it.

Trust me: We'll all be much, much happier this way.

I'll See Your Dead Girl and Raise You One Kitten

Oh--oh--real cute, Jim. Jim wants to tell you all a pretty story in return for your donating to the Spirit of America Iraqi Television Request via the Volleyball Competition. I mean the Vinegary Constitution. No, I mean--look, never mind.

A story? A STORY? We're auctioning stories now?

Look, this is how it is: I think you should donate to help Iraqis get their news from their own countrymen, rather than solely through Arab satellite networks. I've already written about why I think this is important.

And I think only a total dork would choose to give generously through this Victimy Correlation outfit, particularly when it would be so much more rewarding to give generously through the Almighty, Hell-Raisin', Rollin'-Over-Punks-Like-a-Redneck-Trucker* LIBERTY ALLIANCE, the only party that is on the record as being 100% pro-kitten.

Could you really live with yourself if you said "no" to the kittens?

I don't think you could. I know my readers better than that. You are men and women of conscience, valor, generosity, and no-holds-barred kitten appreciation. And that is why you want to click here and scroll down and hit that donation button.

A story. Honestly. Don't you want more? Don't you deserve more? I think you do. And I think you deserve to CHOOSE how you wish to be rewarded.

So here's the deal: You go right over here and donate $5.00 (or more) to Spirit of America, and you let me know about it by e-mailing your donation receipt to ilyka[insert at-symbol here]ilyka.mu.nu, and you take your pick of the following:

1. A poem about the subject of your choice;

2. A 10-question interview (subject: you!), to be posted on this site once complete; or

3. A completely confidential 10-card Tarot reading.

$5.00-you-call-its. Look, if I could send bottles of booze or elegant desserts to you through the internet instead, I would, but I've got to deal in virtual goods here. So those are the virtual goods.

Now damnit, show me the money, or I drop the f-bomb some more. No, not that f-bomb; this one.

*with apologies to LL Cool J